8 Minutes

It's simple really, you put on a song, (this one was about 8 minutes long) and you write while it plays. No editing. No re read. Just write it and be done with it. Here it is:

It came to me as a very mellow realization. It took it’s own time. I wasn’t rushed into it, not at all. It made me very happy, no doubt, that I had realized it, but at the same time, the realization itself was a little…

            Well I was let down to be honest. I knew it was true but it was just so… Saddening. I realized we all come here. We’ve all reached this wonderful place that we call earth. This little corner that we’ve carved for ourselves in the universe. Of course, we didn’t have much to do with getting it, but I think we’ve done a pretty crazy job shaping it. I wish we had been a little more careful, but then, we are but children. Toddlers. Babies. Compared to the universe we live in, we’re hardly a few minutes old at this point. We’ll get there some day. I’m sure.

            I’m sure because…  I believe. I… Believe in people. Human ambition. And Capacity. And Potential. I believe we can truly achieve anything we want. We can improve ourselves, despite ourselves. We’ve put a man on the moon, a number of robots on mars. We’ve cured diseases and we’ve built structures that challenge the tallest mountains and deepest oceans. We are the most advanced race this planet has. We are the epitome of evolution. Conscious, sentient beings.  Walking, communicating, loving, hating, inventing. We are amazing. But somehow, my realization introduced me to an idea that reminded me that there’s something missing.

            A sense of disconnect. I feel like I’m no longer in touch with something greater. Something I was very very close to at some point in time. I feel incomplete. Like a part of me is missing. Sometimes I feel like I haven’t been home in as long as I can recall. My entire lifetime has been just aimless wandering. I feel tired. I feel… Alone at times. At times I feel afraid. I wish I could talk to someone about it but for some reason, so few of us understand. But I’m still positive y’know? I’m positive that I’ll get there. That collectively we’ll get there. One day. Because we are better than we think we are. We are worse than we believe ourselves to be. We are capable of anything. And we have the ability to chose. We’ll get there, eventually. We’ll get there. I know.

In case you're wondering, the song I was playing was Fjor Piano by Sigur Ros